How Important is Honesty

It’s an odd question isn’t it? How important is honesty? I have found in life that people have different ideas about what honesty actually is. And what is a truth, and what is a lie. I recently drifted away from a very good friend because of a lie that I could not forgive, or forget. 
Sometimes I wonder; why did that lie matter so much to me? Why could I not just let it go? But it played on my mind, bothered me; you see the consequences of that lie could have been huge to me. Fortunately people knew me well enough to know better than believe her. It was the intent I could not get over. That someone told a lie to put themselves in the clear.
How Important is Honesty

It made me realise how absolutely vital honesty is to me. I can’t lie for toffee; I am a rubbish liar. If I told an untruth I would forget, confuse myself and trip myself up in no time at all. I also can’t forgive lies; if somebody tells me a lie it shocks and offends me, even the white ones.

How Important is Honesty

This has in my life time got me in trouble, if a friend asked if an outfit suited them whilst out shopping I have to be honest. I once told a friend a dress didn’t suit her, she was upset as she really liked it. I regretted it, as then I spent hours traipsing round shop, after shop with her to find an alternative. And my honesty had caused a stinking atmosphere. Another friend who smoked once asked if I could smell cigarettes on her and I said yes and offered her a mint, she looked really hurt. But she did ask!
How Important is Honesty

In my younger days I used to appear quite abrasive, people would be easily offended. I hope a have learnt to rein in my honesty a tad, I am so soft inside, and would hate to offend people,it would really upset me if I ever offend anyone. But do wonder why anyone would ask me the truth if they don’t want to hear it. Anyone who knows me accepts that. 
I try so hard to bite my tongue these days and offer no opinion; I find that’s the best policy in life.
When you think about it, we lie to our children as soon as they can speak, yes it’s a magical lie , but all the same still a lie. A lie that I wholeheartedly embrace every year like any other parent. Or could this be seen as the exaggeration of a beautiful myth. That sounds better doesn’t it. 
I have found some great quotes about honesty, which I have added to this post.  I hope I can bring my children up to be honest adults, hopefully a more diluted version of my honesty would be good.
I think I have learnt in life there is a time and a place for honesty, and the odd little white lie to protect a loved ones feelings doesn’t always hurt, although it feels wrong; it sometimes is the kinder option. However in the same token I could never let a friend buy an outfit that they look a total Muppet in! Or stand by whilst my best friends husband had an affair, what sort of friend would I be? And I would hope my friends would be equally honest with me.
I have also learnt that honesty is a very personal thing, something that people can interpret very differently. What is a huge fat lie to me could be insignificant to another. The key is to surround yourself with people who have the same standards where honesty is concerned. 

Author of Extraordinary Chaos a family lifestyle and travel blog from a 40+ mum of teenage boys, sharing our family travels, recipes, reviews and country living. Also the co editor of Cruising With Kids Family Cruise Blog

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